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Home Angry Time Stories Pay Attention, Padre!
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Written by Northe   
Thursday, 15 September 2005 00:00
First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

I had to come into work early today due to our work load and the fact that both Male Boss and Female Boss have early morning appointments with clients.  Sleepily I lumber into the office and slump down on my desk until I have a reason to pretend to be coherent and working.  Time passes and I hear Padre shuffle into the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee.  I straighten my back and begin to pretend like I am a busy bee.  He goes to and fro from the cupboards to the fridge collecting his morning meal.  Turns out Padre is a quick study when it comes to breakfast and is no longer relying on Female Boss to prepare him breakfast.

"Yes, Puppy yes. Good girl," I hear Padre commenting to Puppy that seems to be shadowing his every move.

"Ha ha ha, yes The One, good boy," sounds like Padre is having a ball.

Female Boss is nearing as all of a sudden The One's attention is turned to intense crying.  Not more than a few seconds later do I hear Female Boss enter the living room screaming to Padre.

"Oh shit, Padre! Get the hell out!"

"What say?" questions Padre.

"Somebody has the runs!"

"The what?"

"The runs!  Somebody has the runs!  Get out!"

"Oh for the love of Pete!" snaps Padre.

I get up to survey the disaster.  Essentially the kitchen floor looks like a two year old took a gallon of brown paint and smeared it everywhere.  I guess one of the dogs opened the sluice box earlier in the morning and poor Padre never saw it.  His pajama bottoms stirred it all up and smeared it everywhere possible.  Poor Padre's white striped pajama bottoms are completely sopping wet and have brown paw marks all around up to his knees.  So foul.